getting into the swing of things

it's been a while since i've done anything that anyone with an ounce of sense would call productive but i think maybe i'm coming around. in the past few months i have mad a conscience decision* to continue school as well as get off of my ass and practice martial arts again. the last one alone i believe is worth a cookie. :D

school, as important as it may seem to some individuals has always been a bit of a let down for me; either i was extremely bored and penalized for my refusal to do "busy work" or i was excited to begin and learn a new subject matter and penalized with inadequate teachers. so needless to say-but i'll say it anyway, i wasn't the honor roll bumper sticker sort of student.

martial arts on the other hand is something i have been in love with ever since i first saw the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles back in the 80's, to not have anything to do with it for as long as i did was in a word...devastating. the reasons behind why are riddled with too many excuses and socio-political jargon to discuss without rekindling forgotten anger so i will let them pass. not only is it a joy to relive aching muscles and sore throats, but to be transported to another country to enjoy one of the activites i knew i would participate in forever simply because of the love i had shown for it earlier is phenomenal. sometimes i wish i could just get a glimpse of the future so i wouldn't waste so much time on arbitrary feelings and thoughts...

*a conscience decision is an odd phrase i think because aren't all of our decisions conscience? unless i'm wrong-and i highly doubt that i am- unconcious decisions are labled instinct, something our bodies and minds do without conscience input. but whatever, maybe i think too much...consciously.